Steve
‘Who am I?’ as I sit on the side of the road on a curb, looking down into a puddle, gazing at my reflection realizing that I’m way past my prime to be a male model. I’ll tell you who I am; I’m 29-year-old man in Jr. College that still think there’s a future in Pro Longboarding. I know what you’re thinking: it’s ok, just try not to laugh too hard…thanks. I’m 5’11 and shrinking with a prominent booty chin and slight male pattern balding. I’m just going to say right now that booty chin is coming back, mark my word– you heard it here first. Any time the stash comes back in fashion it is shortly followed by the infamous butt chin or booty chin. The best mustaches reside above a strong butt chin.
I have a Dog named Jeff, he’s a beagle. He has boundary issues and I think he’s gay, which is cool don’t get me wrong. I’m open minded and don’t care ether way. I’m just pointing out a struggle that I feel, as well as his therapist feels. He is having a hard time grasping and accepting that about himself.
I read a lot of books about wizards and demons and magic, with barbaric babes with battle-axes in them. You know the kind of gal that you would see painted on the side of a van, standing on the cliff over looking a landscape with three moons, holding a huge axe and wearing a rawhide bikini fighting a dragon. It is my belief that if my dad didn’t make me go surfing I would be in my parent’s garage at this very moment rolling the die (that’s advanced dungeons and dragons slag for rolling the dice. It’s a dice game), arguing with my unusually socially awkward dungeon master that there is no way that fourth degree wizards fire can burn through my elf armor. Thank god for surfing. Oh and finally I love (I’m using the word love) Movies.
